Yesterday I noticed that the kitchen area of my home had become infested with ants. They were marauding around like they owned the place and seemed particularly taken with the doorway which connects the kitchen to the living room.I was not in the mood to deal with a colony of ants so I shouted Alan.
'I can't deal with these ants on top of everything else that life has thrown at me' I expectorated.
Alan instructed me to fetch a chair and then set about trying to establish the vantage point at which the ants were entering the premises. It was more difficult than it seemed as they were not congregated in any one area.I had no patience to deal with the issue so I fetched a roll of sellotape and then began taping up every hole and crack within a mile radius of where the first ants had been sighted.During this Jan texted and demanded a photo of the ants. She declared that as it was her birthday, I had to oblige with this request. So, I managed to squash one in order to take its picture and then I sellotaped it to the doorway as a warning to all its friends about what could happen if this behaviour continued.Jan liked the ant picture, although the resolution of the image sent down the phone was not as clear as I would have liked.This led to her questioning whether the photo was of an ant or a sultana.I do not enjoy the company of sultanas though and would certainly never entertain them in the house.
Once the vast majority of my kitchen had been taped up, Alan and I settled down for a session of uneasy goggle box viewing. Alan took it upon himself to conduct hourly 'ant patrols' in which he would assess numbers of ants and squash any new residents with kitchen towel.We had some debate when he suggested that one he had seen scurrying around was not new, but an earlier ant that had missed the first round of squashing.
'Did you recognise its face?' I asked sniggering.
By that evening the infestation seemed to have calmed somewhat. The hourly ant patrols yielded approximately 4-6 ants, which was well within a manageable range.Today, I have squashed about 6 of the creatures and I must admit I am intensely infuriated as to why I cannot find where they are coming in. I was all prepared to just ignore the problem but tonight when I was eating my tea I saw one climbing up my arm.If anyone can assist me with this difficult problem I would be most grateful.
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2 comments:
get yourself a bug bomb and place it in your kitchen and go stay somewhere overnight...when you get back there will be nothing but dead bodies and the fond memories of those furtive creatures before their violent, hideous death screams pierced the emptiness of your now bugless flat!
I have been reading disturbing articles by starving vegetarians that say you should not be squashing these bugs, but collecting them for snack. Supposedly insects are rich with protein and are crunchy and much better for you than meat. Plus, they are free. Can you imagine the day when you walk into a supermarket and they have an insect aisle where they will charge different prices on live bugs depending on their nation of origin or their protein levels? Can you imagine what a hoot the nutrition/ingredient label would be on a pack of ants? Yummmmm!
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