Laura and the proof that God exists

After pondering philosophical matters in my last blog, I am inspired to continue with serious themes. The question of whether God exists has always been a hotly debated topic and I have now collated enough evidence to prove without a shadow of a doubt that he is real.

God has always expectorated that he does not need to give us proof of his existence. In fact, he said to ask for it is demonstrates a lack of faith, which then nullifies his existence. But he must have had a change of heart when I was born, as I have been blessed with many undisputed examples that he is alive, well and moving amongst us. He must have taken a shine to me and who can blame him, or perhaps he has read my blogs.

At first glance it would seem illogical to believe in something you cannot see, hear,touch, smell or taste. But the same could be said for electricity, which can most definitely be experienced by all the senses when you stick a wet finger into a plug socket. It is the same with God. You only have to stick a wet finger in the prayer socket and a jolt of proof will course through your distended veins.

For instance, I prayed recently that Big Brother would not be taken off our screens, even though there were constant examples of bullying and aggressive behaviour displayed by the contestants. It was a desperate prayer, as I knew that the show had been dogged with bad publicity since the Jade Goody racism incident and was floundering under the weight of unnaceptable viewing guidelines. God heard my prayer as I turned on my google box to find Big Brother still on. I do not agree with racism and bullying but the rest of BB is addictive in the extreme and is like Pringles, in that once you start, you can't stop.

I also prayed last night that my spot would not develop any more pus in the night and my plea was answered. It had a large red scab, but the skin was definitely healing and I could apply make up to the blemish without the risk of a nasty yellow head coming back.

Once I realised that having prayers answered was as easy as ordering groceries online, I knew I must not be selfish. I prayed for others too, so that they could share in my good fortune. I asked God for a world miracle and in response he gave us Max Factor 'Miracle Touch' foundation,which has ended the misery of an uneven complexion. Indeed it is a truly miraculous product that goes on like a dream and does not require a top coat of powder.

I also said a prayer for Britney Spears. It went something like this:'Dear God, my bezzie mate. Please give Britney the strength not to commit suicide. I know she has been through a rough time and struggles to manage her commitments of singing,motherhood and looking foxy, but suicide cannot be in her plans. Help her get back on top of her game and produce more brilliant,catchy throwaway pop songs'.

This prayer worked like a charm and within a couple of months she was back on my telly box cavorting about and singing the hit tune 'Piece of me'. So all you disbelievers out there, eat your words. Just have a go at some praying tonight and provided your wishes are not too outlandish, you may well get a pleasant surprise.